Before you, I saw me. After you, I only recognized a part of me. Why?
There was a time I would stare at my reflection and the only thing I would notice were how my eyes sparkled, how beautiful my smile was and how my soul was so bright, it’s radiation would bypass any of my physical attributes. Now all I notice are the dark marks, stretch marks, black heads, pimples, crooked teeth and cellulite you found so disturbing. So disturbing that you thought it was okay to disclose that if I looked like her/him, I’d be worth being recognized as a person suitable for your outlook on how society should be.
A sad reality for quite a few of us. It’s heart breaking actually, that a whole stranger can walk into your life and leave having made you look at yourself different. We let that happen, we birthed our insecurities and then took care of them. We don’t want them but yet here we are, giving them life on a daily. I do it because most of the times I think I’m not worth it, what about you?
I know you know that I can see that pimple/ black head/ jacked up teeth and bunion on your toe, but guess what? It’s okay, a perfect imperfection (if that’s how you want it sold). It’s what makes you, you (physically speaking anyway).
You my darling are someone’s prayer in the flesh, from the shape of your head to the look of your toes. That smile, those eyes, that tummy/ bosom/ buttock/ teeth, the sound of your voice and that laugh is what someone somewhere is looking for, the plot twist is that, that person has got to be you.
The problem begins when we begin to find our worth in other people’s opinions of us, but we can ‘easily’ take that power back (it’s not really easy but it’s not impossible either). For me it was/ is challenging but here’s how I’m getting the hang of it. I have a list of things I absolutely love and adore about myself and whenever I feel not so good about myself and my insecurities are doing the most, I take that list, read it, stare at my reflection and look at all the things I love. I then move onto staring at those I convinced myself are imperfections, try to find the beauty in them and that helps a little with the acceptance. I make it a point that after each starring season, I find at least one thing (no matter how tiny) I can add to my list of things I adore about myself.
The conversation on body image is a taboo in society unless something is being sold and I find that to be wrong on so many levels. Let’s begin the conversation today. What do you think of yourself? Do you have any insecurities of your own? And if so, are you doing anything about them?
Let’s chat. Love Lelo